Can't Sleep

I can't sleep tonight. I guess it's a mixture of nerves, excitement adn sadness that I'm leaving my boys for5 days. I miss them already!! We were in the car earlier and Connor just quietly said, "Mamma, I love you." Then Caleb added, "Yeah, I love you too...you're a good mom." Wow, those were exactly the words I needed to hear before I sent them away.
I know that I'm doing what God wants me to do and in the process setting an example for my boys - an example of doing God's work by serving others. I think that's why I've made it a point to record this entire experience - so that they can look back on it one day and see not only the blessings that will come with it, but also the sacrifices.
I had to go back and read my earlier blog on trust - just to remind myself that our lives are in His hands. I am really praying right now that God wil take this fear from me and give me peace and comfort, knowing that my babies are in good hands and will be safe and protected while I'm gone.
I'm also thinking about my grandmother, who is back in the hospital - praying that everything will be okay while I'm gone and that she will get to go home soon.
It's funny to me how I started all of this with such energy and excitement, but now I'm having second thoughts and doubts. I need to just let it go and give all of these feelings over to Him!! If this is truly His plan for me right now, then all will be fine - no matter what happens! I am so thankful thay my God is such a loving God -a protector, a Comforter, and a Calmer of all my fears who deserves all that I can possibly give Him!
Okay...I'm ready now!!